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Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Hundred Acre Hood and other tales


A wee round-up of happenings north of Watford Gap.

Lost and Found.

A Toy Town
Polis spokestoon commented, "We are glad to see the wee bear back with Piglet, Eeyore and the gang. Winnie has a serious pot habit (honey that is- ed.) and he was persuaded by some clever but unscrupulous types to venture into Toy Town™ to source his stash. Fortunately, we combed the city and in the bees nest that is Hundred Acre Hood, during a co-ordinated intelligence-led sting operation our colleagues traced Winnie. Toy Town™ Polis would like to take this opportunity to reiterate that it will not tolerate the kidnapping of toons."

PC Milne (no relative) added, "
I'm glad he didn't come to a sticky end."

The local paper reported that, "After a hive of activity in the north of the city, Pooh was rescued."

Jacquelyn Liddell, Managing Director of Storybook Glen, originally told BBC Scotland when Winnie was reported missing that: "It's shocking. I just wish parents would see where their children are at night."

Wise Owl responded last night by stating, "Sometimes people jump to conclusions."

Eeyore, never one to be serious, said, "Here's some more Poo."

When asked to comment, Piglet merely said, "Oh, d-d-d-dear."

Bad day at the Office - Part 1

Some days you just wish you'd been elsewhere. Horrendously bad luck all round, for the bereaved, the other car driver and the poor Polis.

Bad day at the Office - Part 2

Every custody officer's and force's nightmare, but whatever the reason it's even more of a nightmare for the relatives. However, after the loon's last two exploits, I do hope he'd asked for forgiveness for his sins before his untimely death.

Note to Northern Constabulary - I'd start crossing your collective toes if I were you.

What a silly Hunt

Well clearly the digit curling up North isn't working. Read the article's comments to get the full flavour of the 'story'.

Judge Dredd

I have to admit I had to read this article twice. Well that's because the first time I fell off my chair in shock. Without wishing to add my support so freely to the vigilante system in Prison, it should at least make those who commit the more dastardly of crimes think twice, because despite it all there is still a moral code amongst some of the pros amongst the cons!

That's enough jox vox for now.

© Mr Plod

Published by Toy Town™ Times

2 comments:

Officer Dibble said...

I was quite disturbed at the sight of this Hundred Acre Wood Crew and decided to do some research.
According to the Official Site and 'Meet the Gang' there are certain traits which seem to form part of all urban youth

Tigger clearly suffers from ADD and requires Ritalin

Piglet seems to be suffering withdrawal symptoms from Cannabis

Rabbit gets angry if he doesnt get his own way

and Roo is the product of a single parent family in need of a father figure.

ASBOS all round!

Noddy said...

Sadly, I also visited the site as part of my research and you make a good point. Toytown is so much more civilised.