An evil combination

Local Holiday weekends, full moons and lateshifts - that's what constitutes a cocktail of dread.

Well, I felt the full force of its hangover, believe me.

Working Time Directives were well and truly required to keep this body from nodding (sic) off last night (and morning) in particular.

Add that to an apparent lack of Plods and it was all hands to the deck. Does anyone actually PLAN for these situations, or do they just sneak up on them?

However, there were two bright moments to keep me smiling.

Firstly, our 'star' witness at a court case I had last week was being grilled by the defence about a stabbing and the teenage loon was asked, somewhat sarcastically by the brief, if he had any medical qualifications. After a short pause the loon replies, "Aye min, I've got ADHD."

Just as well I didn't have this loon along for corroboration, otherwise we'd have been totally gubbered.  Is it any wonder there's a sad lack of convictions?

Secondly, I had cause to administer a very gentle (honest) single palm fend off with my weak arm to the upper torso (or chest for the MCP's amongst you) of a member of the fairer sex who was trying to extricate a ne'er do well from our grasps. She teetered backwards somewhat drunkenly in her high heels on the cobbles and fell rather unceremoniously on her gluteus maximus. Whinging to a colleague of mine, she stated; "Look, I dinna mind be'en knocked doon, but I've pished masel." Class!

© Mr Plod
Published by Toy Town™ Times