Somewhere in Perthshire

Somewhere in Perthshire,
originally uploaded by Noddy & Mr Plod.

Back from an all too brief few days away and went for some chill in the Highlands.

0/10 - See me please.

A number of media sources such as the Beeb and in more detail The Independent report today that Unicef research entitled Child Poverty in Perspective: An Overview of Child Well-being in Rich Countries shows that our yoof fare worst out of 21 countries.

That may surprise some and not others, but being bottom of the class is surely an indictment of the failure of the promised policy of Education, Education, Education.

n.b. click on photo for larger size.

Up in smoke

Following hard on the heels of the European Community's call for a Europe wide ban on smoking, here comes the hard evidence that it won't be getting full support.

Spam, spam, spam......

The Register reports that Tony Blair is planning to put even further strain on Number 10’s creaking IT infrastructure, by emailing everyone who’s signed the infamous petition against road charging.

Apparently there have been cabinet level mutterings suggesting whoever dreamt up the e-petition scheme was a “prat”, even the transport secretary said, in effect, “debate is good…but we’re doing it anyway.”

Nice to know they listen!

Home turf?

My ickle bruvver has observed that:

"Turncoat Brown is again trying to ingratiate himself with our southern neighbours by supporting the English FA's possible bid for the 2018 World Cup."

Stewart Maxwell MSP, the Scottish National Party's culture spokesman, said:

"Good luck to England, but I suspect that Gordon Brown's support for the bid is more about politics than sport, and his desire to ingratiate himself with the English electorate in his desperation to get into No 10."

Opinions in England were apparently all for going for the bid whilst most in Scotland appeared not to care.

However, the Chancellor appears intent on demonstrating how much he identifies with English voters as he explained:

"I have been around the world, I have been in Asia, America and Europe, and I think there is great support for England having it 50 years after we won the World Cup in 1966," Mr Brown said yesterday.

I assume Mr Brown has now become English. Good luck to them.

P.S. Note to the F.A. Watch out for the VAT.

P.P.S. By the way Scotland are of course the real World Champions as evidenced here. And will of course be the current holders of the Cup on the 24th March of this year when they beat Georgia almost 40 years to the day since they last held the Cup after beating the English at Wembley.

What.... an overweight Polisman?

The Scotsman reports that a couple of loons tried impersonating the Polis to stop a car in the Capital to impress a quine.

One was too overweight to fool her and the other individual was too young.

And there was me thinking "the Polis get younger every day."

Well the lass could always ring Lothian & Borders new 999 service personned by volunteers and explain all about these charlatans. Good luck to her.

Time to put my feet up

It's a special day today. Yep, it's my first block of Annual Leave.

I'm told there's something else significant about today, but I can't recall what it might be.

I have no idea what's going on here

Does Bill Gates know what's going on here?

"He is Scum and should be treated as Scum"

Not my words, but those of a murdered child's mother in respect of a Paedophile who, as reported in the local evening paper;




"Has now joined the queue of money-grabbing cons hoping to cash in on the fact they have to slop out."

If these crims were as inventive in their money making schemes on the other side of the prison walls, then perhaps they would not keep ending up on the wrong side of them.

This is just one of a growing list of suits/challenges to the Prison Service such as this and this.

If the Liberal Democrats have their way there won't be a SPS to sue.

Boro Boro - the Revenge

Jose cannot make his mind up what's funnier; Abel Xavier's hair or his own goal. Or he might have heard this ditty.

The Smogmonster hoodoo is now put to rest.

Boxed 6 feet down under

Reuters report that environment lovers can now take their passion to the grave.

An Australian funeral company is offering coffins made of recycled paper and cardboard as part of a move towards more environmentally friendly funerals.

Being a canny Scot I thought this would be a cheap, alternative way to go!

Unfortunately, the report tells me that the coffins had "a natural, smooth look," but would cost about the same as other coffins.

Never daunted, I did some research and came up with this.

Screwing the System

The Beeb report that a convicted rapist is launching court action claiming his human rights are being breached because he has not been granted early release from jail.



In this case, No definitely, categorically means No.

It's hard enough to get a conviction for rape, so we are told, and then the ECHR comes to the rescue of the crim at the expense of the victim (and potential victims given that the parole board said the public risk he posed was considered "unacceptable").

That would be another case brought to court at OUR expense.

Weather report for Toytown

Given all the fuss down in Englandshire, I thought you might like to be kept up to date with the weather up here in Northern Jockland.

He's embarrassed?

According to the Scotsman, a convicted criminal is taking the Executive to court over the message played before phone calls are accepted on outgoing calls.

The message is as follows:

"This call originates from a Scottish prison. It will be logged and may be recorded and/or monitored. If you do not wish to accept this call, please hang up."

You have to feel sorry for the poor guy whose only crime, this time, involved holding a knife at the throat of a shop manageress and is serving a minor sentence of 21 years at the moment.

Not only is he being allowed to take this to court, but You and I are paying for it.

After a lengthy battle to secure thousands of pounds in legal aid, Stewart Potter, 43, has taken a case to the Court of Session in Edinburgh, claiming the phone message "is an ... embarrassing reminder to his family" that he is calling from prison.

He has served previous sentences of four, six and eight years and was given a nine-year term in 2001 for armed robbery.

In 2002, he stood trial for another robbery, committed just before the nine-year sentence had been imposed. In that case, he threatened the manageress of a Glasgow off- licence with a knife, then ordered her and a customer into a toilet. He fled with £292 but was arrested after police used CS spray to disarm him.

He was jailed for 12 years, to begin at the end of the nine-year sentence.

You must have some thoughts.

n.b. Mercilessly nicked (sic) from my ickle bruvver - ta loon.

There's snow business like ...

One or two softie sassenachs have been posting about the wee dusting of sna they've been having.

We are unfortunately used to these conditions and well prepared for it most of the time. Some types love it.

I mentioned in a previous post the question of what would happen if they got sna in the 'Smoke.' Well it looks like they PANIC, call the Police and ask, "Well, what are you going to do about it?" I'd tell them to move to sunnier climes, like Spain.

I leave my final word on this to the The Register.

Off his head

Just read a report from the Beeb in which they describe how a man was caught driving at 70mph down the A9 near Auchterarder whilst shaving.

He apologised to the Polis, telling them he was late for a lecture he was due to give on First Aid and Health & Safety.

Inside his car were a number of mannequins used for CPR training (aka Resusiannies).

I bet the Polis were bristling with annoyance at this 'expert' on health and safety. He was a hair's breadth away from giving himself a rather nasty nick as illustrated.

It always gets me in a lather when I hear of clowns speeding. It is not clever, manly etc etc.

Apparently not everyone agrees though as can be seen here and here.

Personally, I prefer my close shaves to be at home.

Some folk are never happy

A certain Scottish Force has spent an alarming £10,000 on Tasers and then never bothered to use the things, according to local reporting.

This is clearly an utter waste of resources and I think we should just go out and zap the first toe rag we see just to keep everyone happy that we are utilising our gizmos.

On the other hand we could sell them off and just resort to jumping up and down... at least it's cheaper.

Time: 1800hrs. Location: Main St., Toytown

BusyBizzie has posted about Road Pricing and Gridlock.

Armed with my ancient mobi and no-one to happy slap I took this pic tonight on my way home.

My own private bus from the city centre to suburbia!

Is it any wonder the roads are clogged with cars.

And as James Brown would have put it, ecologically speaking that is, "I feel good!"

Should YOU arrest?

PC Bloggs - a Twenty-first Century Police Officer - has posted advice on whether mops should arrest ne'er-do-wells here.

I must caution Scots readers that this applies only to the other parts of the UK, but the post and link made me laugh, then cry, at the sheer absurdity of it all.

The comments make interesting reading too, so check the full post out.

As someone else has said before .... you couldn't make this up.

Finally,

“Men sleep peacefully in their beds at night because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf” - George Orwell

Personality analysis from just four questions

Your Personality Cluster is Introverted Thinking

Apparently I am: Objective, honest, and credible Intellectually curious, with many diverse interests More inclined toward ideas than people Fiercely independent and unapologetically unconventional

What's Your Personality Cluster?