Shake ups

Apparently, I was looking a little dated and I have been revamped for the digital age. I was particularly pleased to hear that "Noddy will also have some new vehicles at his disposal - including a helicopter and a monster truck - to help him get around Toy Town."

The Torygraph goes further and tells me that I will "get to have a few adventures down by the harbour." Anyone who lives in Toy Town™ will know that ain't exactly somewhere I should be adventuring. I'm apparently in line for a submarine too. I know it is alleged to be damp round these parts, but that is taking the p....

Meanwhile, Mr Plod drew this latest result of HMG brainstorming to my attention. He told me a little wee came out when he read it (it's an age thing), especially when he heard Liberty were endorsing it. He also suspects there may well be a little public disappointment at the sentencing.

© Noddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Ho Ho Ho

Festive Greetings to you and yours Ms Spliff.

On behalf of my English & Welsh colleagues, go choke on your toke and may your stockings be as empty as your promises.


© Mr Plod
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Blow me!

This will have to be quick one! Late shift followed by early turn and all that.

I was flabbergasted by this report in the local 'news'paper.

This could add a whole new meaning to the phrase uttered by our hoors, "No glove. No love."

It also reminded me of the way I was taught to remember which was which between stalagmites and stalagtites.... the latter go* down!

I wonder what the frail old lady freezing beside her 1 bar fire in her house this winter will make of all this.

Cracks me up, so it does.

* ( alternatively come)

© Noddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

What's in a name?

Not having ever considered Toytown's harbour area as a red light zone, as that would be to glamorise same and there is little glamour in prostitution in this country, I was amused by this post which aptly gave our own zone the amusing title of a green light district.

This was particularly amusing as it was in stark contrast to the ongoing debate as to the legal standing of such Tolerance Zones, or as we Polis prefer Management Zones.

As the Neighbour states, hoors are probably better off working with the lights off!

Would you, could you, should you?

Sky News report that in order to gain sufficient evidence to prosecute those running brothels in Sydney, Australia, the local Mayor has had to send in Private Detectives.

Wikipedia would have me believe that,

"Increasingly, modern PIs prefer to be known as "professional investigators" rather than "private investigators" or "private detectives". This is a response to the seedy image that is sometimes attributed to the profession and an effort to establish and demonstrate the industry to be a proper and respectable profession."

Oops!

I particularly liked the following excerpt from the Sky report,

"On numerous occasions over numerous days and times they had to fulfil the act."

... and I can just hear the spouses greeting their hubbies on their return home with a, "Hard day at work dear?"

Well I suppose every job has its ups and downs, but blow me!

Now let me think....If the PI's were paid to have sex, are they then hoors as well?