Twist in my Sobriety

Guess who's Nightshift this Hogmanay (or as famously once described "Mahogany").

Thus, as one of the few sober eens amongst the stocious throngs, I thought this video was apt.



Bliadhna Mhath Ùr to all and sundry.

......... and the twist?

There's a bottle of Laughing Frog with my name on it waiting for my return home.

Slàinte Mhath!

© Noddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

A powerful wee message

There was a time when my father passed away far too young in life and I was 'lost' without him.

I was searching for the friend, guide and counsel he represented.

I was unable to settle and one night I woke bolt upright from my sleep and these following verses were directed to me as if in a dream.

Being hardly the world's foremost expert on The Book, I hadn't even heard of Ephesians and knew even less about what was within.

Reading the verses, I found I had a new 'Father', guide, friend and counsel. There was an even more humbling message, which to this day I find so difficult to reconcile with my less than perfect 'brand' of Christianity.

On this special eve, I bring you my own revelation and the genesis of my faith.

Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.

For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.

In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding.

And he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times will have reached their fulfillment—to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ.

In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory.

And you also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God's possession — to the praise of his glory.

Ephesians 1, v2-14

© Noddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Nollaig Cridheal

Getting my Xmas message in early 'cos some of us have to be up at dawn to go to work.

But to you and yours. Have a cracker.

© Noddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Feel Friday

I am filled with a deep foreboding.

It is the dreaded 'Feel Friday' and guess who is lates?

People, oft referred to as 'pilot lights'* will be thronging toy toon sinter after much ale and jolly offices japes. Mix this with the usual suspects and the happy homecomings thereafter and we are due for a busy night.

Wish me well and if you are one of those aforementioned types, remember a whole weekend care of the local free B&B is a rough way to sleep off a hangover.

To fellow short straw pullers throughout the emergency services, the best of Scottish to you all.

That cough of mine seems to be getting worse. Now what's that number again for absence management?

*i.e. they never go out.

© Mr Plod
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Xmas Lichties - The Finale

I fear I am becoming obsessed, so whilst not promising, this may be the last offering. Epileptics look away.

© Noddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Mair Xmas Lichties

H/T to RT.

By the way I'm still waiting for those photos folks.

© Noddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Hacked off

A wee while back I posted about Gary McKinnon and suggested the US might overreact a tad.

The latest article from the Beeb suggests he could face up to 70 years in gaol. That's enough for me to suggest Mr Obama might want to reconsider when he comes to power in the New Year.

© Mr Plod
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Far div yi bide?

Anither wee doric tester for yi.

© McNoddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Wither Forecast

Aye, fine, bit nae abidy gets the choice tae bide at hame. Some of us hae tae work 24/7. It's been chookin it doon hale watter a' weekend. Drookit I wis, min. Mind yi, jist as weel it wisna caller or I'd be knee deep in sna.

© McNoddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Jox Vox - Vol. 1

You might have noticed from my sidebar that due to the apparent demise of fellow Polis bloggers, I appear to be the only Polisperson posting from north of the border.

I feel it incumbent upon me then to keep everybody up to date with the weird and wonderful happenings, Polis related or otherwise, up in the frozen wastelands of God's own country.

Following on from what might be considered the pilot post, I have decided to post regularly on such matters and I have these following offerings for you.

BBC NEWS | Scotland | North East/N Isles | Pub-goers to be tested for drugs

Random drug testing attacked - Press & Journal

Well at least it's a better plan than this or this.

Maybe Mr Rumbles should have a peek at this before he opens his mouth and puts his foot in it.

Twining will like this snippet.

Up here in Draconia we still occasionally persecute, sorry prosecute, very wee weans. But just to level the playing field, I believe adults will now have to suffer like the little children. It's significant that once the pain is to be meted out on adults, a furore starts. I did warn you. A crafty US judge has taken this principle even further.

We have just celebrated St Andrew's Day and Gadget will be interested to note this ovine method of marking the occasion.

You can read this snippet and make your own mind up. I have. Get off your behind, quine.

A while back I bleetered on about prostitution. I think that the Polis are going to say to the Law Makers, "We told you so."

By far and away my favourite snippet recently has to be the Spiderpig debacle. Brilliant.

As regular visitors will know, I have a passion for whisky (in moderation of course) and our wonderful Chancellor and his boss, despite being Scots, seem determined to destroy the industry and dent my pocket. I have four related offerings to mull over whilst you sip (very slowly) your dram.

Outrage at tax raid on the whisky industry - Press & Journal

Excise duty increase leaves a bitter taste - Press & Journal

BBC NEWS | Scotland | 'Whisky sour' claim after Budget

BBC NEWS | Scotland | Whisky duty rise 'to be revised'

I cannot leave you without commenting on what's happening down south. The new Government inspired (tongue firmly in cheek) Police Pledges leave me awestruck and this article's heading sums it up;

Police will respond quicker to burglary victims if they are 'upset' - Telegraph

I have yet to entertain a genuine complaint of housebreaking from a cheerful householder! I'll let Jacquie Spliff know when I do.

Secondly, I note there's been a bit of a stooshie over some CCTV footage again. Don't mess with me has posted the most illuminating take on this in my view. I also direct you to a previous post on the Perils of CCTV from my good self.

Finally, Jox Vox rule.

© McNoddy
Published by Toy Town™ Times

Xmas Lichties

I dah ken aboot you, but fan the winter festival time comes aroond, een o' my favourite pastimes oan the job is tae ging roond an' see fit folk hae been pittin up on or ootside their hooses in the wiy o' Xmas decorations. Aye, Xmas I said.

It iywiz scunners me 'at the guid folk o' the sink estates seem to hae a puckle o' siller left in the bankie to spend on feel inflatables and hunnerds o' lichties emitting a carbon footprint visible fae the ISS.

I hae started a competition amongst my colleagues tae undertake a Phase B search tae find the worst excesses. There is a clear leader already wi' a 30 foot tree in a garden wi' tinsel (aye tinsel!) and a flashing star on the top, an' lichties a' oer. Jist to ram the pint hame, the same folk hae put up mair lichties a' oer the gable end o' the hoose. I hanna had the chance tae ging roon the front tae see fit delights await me yonder.

I wis considering takkin my camera wi' me on nichts jist tae record a' the worst eens and get a snap o' the hale hoose aforementioned, but 'at wid be surveillance an' I hanna had time tae pit in the necessary forms!

Please feel free to join in the competition! Jist mind the paperwork first, min.

© Mr Plod
Published by Toy Town™ Times